How Ryan 'Little Superman' Roberts helped me....

 I want to take time and tell you all about how a little 2 year old boy with Down's Syndrome, who is 600 miles away, and who I never met, has inspired me, and even ignited a fire in me. I first heard of him about 2 months ago from a Facebook acquaintance. I read his story. I don't remember what kind of day I was having, but something about Ryan Roberts story just sparked an interest in me. I read how a little boy, who many people in society would willingly shun because of a "disability", had been such an inspiration to many around him through his love of ice cream. Ice Cream parties for Ryan were popping up all over. The parties were to raise awareness of people with special needs. I started including Ryan in my daily prayers. I also read where they didn't expect him to live much longer with the heart defect he suffered with. I started following his progress closely every day, and as I've said before, I shut my big mouth, opened my mind, and learned some valuable lessons from him. I learned courage, bravery, to smile every day no matter how bad i'm feeling. I learned to look for the good in all situations, and use what positive things I could. I also began to learn more about myself. I learned how I never expressed how I was feeling because I didn't want anyone to know I was weak, when everyone already knew. I didn't want to feel any emotions, every female I have had a relationship with in the past 6 years since my divorce has made the smart choice and left me, and I was spiritually dead, well on my way to being physically dead from alcohol. I didn't want to talk to anyone, didn't want to see anyone, so I drank. I cut myself off emotionally from everyone. Seeing how Ryan overcame his illness at just 2 years old and inspired people made me think. Most of my problems are of my own creation. I have hurt many people just by my selfish behavior and not loving myself. Through Ryan's story, I was able to realize that I do matter to people, I do want to feel emotions (even sadness when I have to), and I want to live. That meant it was time for a radical change.. I had to change everything.. Many of you knew the me I wanted you to see. The happy person willing to do things for others. I wanted the image, but I really was selfish. I just wanted to be accepted. I wanted you all to love me.. I never felt like I belonged anywhere, and even after I lost all of the weight, I still felt that way. I no longer have that attitude.. I now love God, then myself, then my family and friends.. That is why the change.. That is why all the messages of encouragement. I know that out of the 800 plus friends (of whom I know or have met 97%) someone somewhere is in need of encouragement somewhere. I hope my words inspire and encourage, and make you think.. Through Ryan's inspiration, I will keep up the positive messages, and the positive and at times funny pics.. I love you all and I want nothing but the best for each and every one of you.. I want to do my part each day im on Facebook to at least put a giggle or a smile on everyones faces.. You all mean that much to me.. I love you all, and I hope Ryan's story helps and inspires many people, and I hope and pray my story can inspire and help someone who is struggling.. Thanks for taking time to read this.... Andy Gilkison

Here is something I wrote..  It's about change and how I view relationships.. It's called "The Gentleman You Don't Know".. : "Hello.. I'm the guy you always smile at, I'm the one who opens your door for you, the one who listens to you when you need someone to talk to. I'm the one who gives you a shoulder to cry on, an arm around your shoulder when you need comfort, the hug you seek when you are sad and hurting. I'm the gentleman in your life. But know this.. I have feelings too. I hate to see you sad, I wonder why you constantly put yourself in relationships where you get yourself hurt by the 'Bad Boy' you have always wanted, I see into your heart and mine breaks when yours breaks. I'm happy when you're happy, and I want to ease your heartache when you suffer. But sadly, to you I am not your everything. I have much to offer. My heart wants to be loved by you. I want to wake up next to you everyday and be the first smile on your face. I want to hold you at night and let you know you're safe and protected. I want to be your strength, your smile, and the reason you love.. Until that day, i'll still be right here.. But! Don't be hurt or surprised one day when you find my heart belonging to someone else. I may be a gentleman, but I won't sit on the dock and wait for the ship to come to port.. Someone, somewhere needs the love I have to give, and if she comes along, I will join her in her journey.. So, if you have doubts and want to take a chance on what I have to offer, now's the time.. Don't let me get away.. For then, i'll be the gentleman you don't know.."